- Oddly enough, easily one of the most-commented GameSetWatch posts to date has been about the preview disc for video game-themed horror flick Stay Alive, and actually, Matthew 'Cinema Pixeldiso' Hawkins made a in-depth review of the film for us late last year.

Well, now it's UK game journo Richard Cobbett's turn, and he has all kinds of fun tearing it to bits, for example: "Really Annoying Brother makes an incomprehensible reference to Quirky Girl having ‘body karate’, to which Goth Chick announces “Anyone who says size doesn’t matter never played a third person shooter.” I have no idea what that’s supposed to mean. Sure, yeah, it’s a penis reference, but if we’re going to do game gags about sexual characteristics, shouldn’t it be something like ‘wrapped round a hot rocket launcher’ or ‘had to wear a bra built to transport baby elephants’. Third person shooter? That’s nonsense, movie!"

Wait, you want more sarcasm? "A bloodsoaked, Bible style book floats onto the screen, and opens up to reveal the ‘Prayer of Elizabeth’ - a bit of generic Goth prose that doesn’t respond to any controls. Yes, the movie has crashed. Oh, wait. Sorry. Quirky Girl suggests that they might have to read it out loud, like the half-hour opening crawl from the Alone in the Dark movie. “No way,” Irritating Brat tells her. “That’s next generation technology!” I wonder who’s going to tell Konami, which released Lifeline three years earlier." It's an enjoyable tearing to bits - so please to enjoy.