- Over at 1UP, Mr. Parish has the obvious article that nonetheless it is necessary to write: 'How Sega Can Save Sonic The Hedgehog', and the intro starts as the piece means to go on:

"Remember the glory days of Sonic the Hedgehog? Once upon a time, he stood face to face with the likes of Bonk and Pac-Man and Mario himself, sneering sarcastically across the battle lines of the 16-bit console wars to remind Super NES owners that their system of choice might have a totally killer sound chip, but dang, was it slow... Those halcyon times, alas, are long gone. Sonic is still a pretty big name, and his adventures make good money for developer Sonic Team and publisher Sega. But these days the little blue guy is way past his prime, as proven by his new outing on Xbox 360 and PS3."

But, but, but, what can be done? "It's not too late for Sonic, though. We still want to love Sega's hyperactive hedgehog, and while our affection becomes more strained with each new, unplayable sequel, we're a forgiving bunch. We've come up with a simple four-step plan to help Sonic speed his way back into our hearts. Please, Sega, before it's too late." Needless to say, the fixes include less Lacey Chabert.