Curse You, Pesky Game Breakers
This one's a bit old, but hey, 1UP's labyrinthine frontpage disgorged it at us and it's good, so who cares? The site has run a feature called 'Game Breakers' which deals with "...ill-advised play mechanics [that] can stop a good game short of greatness and turn a merely unremarkable title into a remarkably bad one."
Some wonderfully grumpy examples? "Sam Fisher isn't a spy. He's a highly trained combat specialist armed with a knife, a machine gun, and grenades. So why, oh why, does he have to sneak past the enemy soldiers undetected in order to complete his missions? Why is he practically helpless to defend himself once he's inevitably discovered? And why would developers give us all those awesome weapons when we can't even use them?"
Also: "Voice chat is a wonderful invention, but it never should've have gotten anywhere near videogames. All it takes is a headset and an anonymous Internet connection to turn the average gamer into a raving, obnoxious jackass." Bring back Phantasy Star Online-style universal icon-based communication, I say!









Comments
Bring back Phantasy Star Online-style universal icon-based communication, I say!
--You are preaching to the choir, my friend.
Posted by: Noun | November 1, 2006 6:42 AM
PSO canned-response communication could potentially be pulled off very well, and in a way that makes people understandable across language barriers (which would be one of its best uses). I can also think of at least one other cool use for it, but I will not reveal that, because I might get to use it in a game myself someday....
However, most people use it merely as a way to make it impossible for people to be assholes in chat and to protect children. That's why Disney use it for Toontown, and that's why Nintendo uses it in their otherwise excellent Clubhouse Games. In Clubhouse Games, in particular, it is does a particular kind of violence to a player's ability to complement or console another player.
Posted by: John H. | November 1, 2006 10:46 AM
Hmmm, and it misidentifies Symphony of the Night as the first major pitless platformer. Strike two.
Posted by: John H. | November 1, 2006 10:50 AM
I find much truth in Penny Arcade's Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory.
Posted by: Shih Tzu | November 1, 2006 10:56 AM
Games were crappy before The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion! This stealth game has too much stealth in it! Nothing is as good as The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion! Which one of you kids stole my hearing aid! Anyone want to play The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion?
Posted by: dannyc | November 1, 2006 7:48 PM
Oh also, I hear that the Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion is a pretty good game. Here's hoping that all games will eventually be just like The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion.
Posted by: dannyc | November 1, 2006 7:53 PM
I hope a follow up to this is planned, because while I enjoyed the article (though I didn't agree entirely witht he stealth premise; I suppose though, that it's supposed to be an overview of lots of different gamer complaints), one "game breaker" that can also be a "deal breaker" for me are cheap, one hit-kill-moves in fighting games.
Bonus rage points if it's UNBLOCKABLE.
One Ninja Gaiden subset annoyance that seems to be a cross-breed between the pit problem and the respawn problem were enemies that would suddenly fly in from the screen, unavoidbly, while you were jumping. CHEESE.
Posted by: Shawn Struck | November 3, 2006 5:53 AM